apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
