I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize