I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
