Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
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