I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
