my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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