before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
