Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Randomize
