So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
