ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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