On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I think people are normalizing furries
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
