Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
