She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
