she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
