when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
