I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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