VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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