Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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