just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
