I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize