the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
