google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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