i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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