if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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