Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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