If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize