Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
