Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
