Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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