if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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