Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
