k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
