Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
