She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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