i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
