jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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