OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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