OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize