I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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