my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
True strength comes from lack of pants
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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