Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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