google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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