I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
3 2 1 whiskey
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
