I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
