Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I can't put those talents on a resume
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
