no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize