I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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