you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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