I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
farters have to be the big spoon...
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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