So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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