Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
