If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize